I think the only thing I liked about your first poem was the name, the subject and this:
They say everybody’s doing it,
That it will make you look cool
The pressure is almost too much
Resistance is hard
Everything else is way too literal and you absolutely need more emotion. The second was better but still lacking as one person had already said. You need to write it as if it happened to you, not in first person but what you think about the situation and how you feel.
Points: 890
Reviews: 129
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